Cat's Adventures in the White House
by The-Riddler95
Summary: By FanWriter83 and The Riddler95. When Cat and all of her friends at Wayne Manor are invited to stay at the White House, trouble follows quickly when Professor Hugo Strange uncovers a dangerous new ability and meets some dastardly help to take over all of America.
1. Chapter 1

**Hey, guys! This story was written by The_Ridder95 and FanWriter83, and it'll change between diary entry format and rule format. If you want, go and check out Things We're Not Allowed to do While We're at Wayne Manor by FanWriter83 and the Secret Diaries of Alfred Pennyworth by The_Riddler95. We both had a lot of fun testing out each other's styles and trying something new! This first chapter was written by FanWriter83, and is from Alfred's point of view.**

Dear Diary,

It's awfully quiet in the mansion and usually it means the unruly brats are plotting a new way to make my life miserable. Maybe I should make a 'casual' stroll through the manor and see what they're doing.

While walking through the hallway I see a blur of brown curls and black leather leave the study indicating Miss Kyle had done mischief in there with Master Bruce. I wait for the blur to head back upstairs then enter the study and find Master Bruce behind his desk (as always), only this time he's making a phone call. It's the first time I see him do that.

It's time to get my eaves drop cloth which is basically a rag I keep hidden under my apron for times I pretend to be cleaning something but actually are listening to the teens conversations. I feel a little bad to do it in front of Master Bruce, because it will be the first time, but desperate times calls for desperate measures.

I stroll nonchalantly toward the coffee table in the centre of the room and start cleaning it while listening to young Master Bruce's phone call.  
"Yeah, I have been pretty busy lately," Master Bruce said to whoever he was calling with. "But I wanted to congratulate you and your dad for winning the president election."

Then it hits me. Master Bruce is calling with his old friend Connor who's dad was running for president. Master Bruce asked me to vote for, no wait… Miss Kyle demanded everyone, on Master B's behave, to vote for Matt Becker.

"If I would like to come visiting you with my friends?" Master Bruce suddenly asked as if the idea hadn't played on his mind and it was completely Connor's idea. I dropped the rag to the table and made all shorts of motions to catch the young boy's attention, but my attempts are futile, because I see my beloved boy grin momentarily before turning his back on me and grinning into the phone; "I would very much like it."

I run with a quick sprint across the room and grab the phone from Master B's hand and holler into it quickly; "Mister Connor, this is Alfred Pennyworth. Can I speak to your father for a moment?"

"Oh, hey Mr. P," the boy said on the other end of the line, ecstatically. "I'm sorry, but my dad is in a very important meeting. I mean, he is the president, but I can give you his assistant's number to make an appointment."

I slap my forehead tiredly then grunt; "No need for that, I can easily say it to you. I'm afraid Master Bruce has way too many friends to take with him when he's visiting you."

"No worries, Mr. P, I live in the White House, so there is plenty enough room." I open my mouth to reply to that, but Young Mister Becker was quicker and adds; "I'll see you all then, bye!"

I scowl angry into the phone then hanging up and turning one-eighty fast enough to see Master Bruce dash out the study door and bellowing to everyone to pack their bags, because they have a plane to catch that will bring them to Washington DC.

A few hours later I find myself in a plane to Washington DC, because I was too lazy to fly the Wayne private jet, along with ten teens, ten cats, one baby boy and three adults. I seriously have no idea where I have gotten myself into, but I also know it won't take long before I do know it.  
It starts right after we are high in the air and the seat belts are allowed to come off when Miss Kyle decided it was time to switch place and sit between Master Bruce and Mister Ornelas while I strictly told her to sit between Mister Kerr and Mister Crane.

Anyway, Mister Bullock is stationed between the two boys, but then a lovely looking lady in the front winked at him and he was smitten instantly. It didn't take long before he bowls over and Miss Kyle takes his seat.

"Hey, my Kitty Toys!" Miss Kyle cried with glee. Master Bruce who was reading The Hobbit simply sends an absent nod, but Mister Ornelas who was flipping through a gym magazine threw it through the plane before greeting her back. "Can you do something for me, Kitty Toy Sean?"  
"Depends!"

"I have an itch on my back, can you help me with that?"

Before Mister Ornelas could reply to that, Miss Kyle stations herself backwards onto his lap to give him a full access to her upper back.  
"It's right there," Miss Kyle said pointing right between her shoulder blades. Instead of scratching her back, Mister Ornelas starts to kiss her neck then nibbling the flesh- Wait, I have to stop them right there.

I jump to my feet then rushing toward them and while the both of them look indifferent at me, I try to teach them it's best for everyone else they keep their intimacy in their bedroom.

"Yeah, whatever, old man!" Miss Kyle said before leaping off Mister Ornelas's lap then looking around the plane; "Have you seen Richard? It's time for his bottle."

Before I could open my mouth and tell her he's with Mr. Gordon, Miss Kyle pushed herself between me and the seat then screaming as she searches the plane; "HAS ANYONE SEEN OUR BABY?!

All the other passengers stare agape at me probably wondering what kind of parent I am for allowing a teen to be a mom. Then Mister Ornelas beams at them proudly; "I'm the dad! Am I lucky or what?!"

A few men give Mister Ornelas an impressed thumb-up then getting smacked to the heads by their wives when their daughters look at their dad's as if they think he will stand fully behind them when they show up pregnant.

I smack Mister Ornelas to the head then scowl to everyone to hear; "Neither of them are the parents, I've adopted the kid"

"He adopted all of us, how freaking sweet is that?" Miss Pepper grinned.

I scowl back; "I didn't adopt all of you! Some of you even have a home to go at, but neither of you ever decide to visit it!"

"That's because of the warm reception we get from you, Mr. P," Miss Chadwick smirked. I wonder if that was the truth or that she was simply being sarcastic with me.

It didn't take long before Miss Kyle found Richard then searching for the bag with baby supplies which she found in Mister Kerr's hands who was sniffing at one of the baby-bottles. Miss Kyle punched his nose and takes it back. I slapped my forehead when Richard gurgled excitedly and Miss Kyle punched Mister Kerr again with the same results.

"Yeah, you like it when 'Mommy' punches uncle Jack, huh?" Then she turns one-eighty and shouts to Mister Ornelas; "Kitty Toy Sean, watch!"  
Mister Ornelas looks over the seat in front of him at the crazy girl who gives Mister Kerr a third punch to the face. Richard giggled his face off.  
A little while later the plane finally touches ground and the kids bowl outside the plane into the airport then all rushing to the front where a limo waited for us to take us to the White House.

Once arriving at the White House's front lawn and being greeted by President Becker and his son Connor, Miss Kyle decided it was up to her to call dibs on the Queen's bedroom. Mister Ornelas was totally agreeing with her and followed her inside.

President Becker watched the lot run inside and said with glee; "They're quite a handful, aren't they?"

"You have no idea," Detective Bullock muttered somewhere from behind me. I simply smirked sheepishly then suddenly Mister Kerr ran past us with his arms full of grenades and shouted he wanted dibs on the Oval office. Right behind Mister Kerr ran four security guards trying to keep up with him and retrieve the weapons.

Then Mister Crane strolls up to us with a can of knock-out gas and asked; "Do you have a room where it's damp, dark and no sunlight gets in?"

"The basement, I guess," President Becker answered then watching Mister Crane resume strolling inside and asking; "Is he alright?"  
"Nobody knows!" Detective Bullock replied then adding; "And nobody cares!"

I push Richard into detective Bullock's arms before apologizing myself and follow the teens to see what they are up to. I arrive in the Queen's bedroom in time to see Miss Kyle hurl herself around Miss Visser and crying gleefully; "2016, here we come!"

Before Miss Visser could swoop off, I jump myself around her to stop her, but it was futile, because I found myself seconds later in Washington DC 2016. It seems like we landed in the middle of another President election which was won by a man named Donald Trump.  
Our ears pick up the sound of a female sobbing and when we turn we see a blonde woman hiding in a nearby alleyway. Miss Kyle skips toward her.

"Hiya, my name is Queen Cat Kyle, what is your name?"

The woman who had her head slumped into her hands looks up warily, then sniffing sadly; "Hillary Clinton."

"Why are you crying, Mrs. Clinton?" Miss Kyle asked sitting down beside the woman.

Before Mrs. Clinton could reply Miss Kyle's question a man with Grey hair drove by in a fancy limo waving at people then spotting the woman and bellowing tauntingly; "I'M A PRESIDENT AND HILLARY IS NOT!"

"What's his problem?" Miss Kyle asked watching the limo pass by with an eye roll. "That's the most childish thing I ever seen an adult do. And I've seen Bullock do lots of childish things, but harmless things comparing to this."

Mrs. Clinton dries her tears and replies; "Yeah, but don't worry, I will get him back for it!" Then she rises to her feet, dusts her clothes off and says; "Maybe it's best for me to return to my home. It was nice meeting you, ehm, Queen Cat Kyle."

"Are you single?" Miss Visser asked. "Because Alfred is! He can cook, he can clean, he can-

I cover Miss Visser's mouth before snarling in her ear; "Maybe it's time for us to head back to our own time period, don't you think?!"  
Noticing the murderous stare in my eyes, Miss Visser nods obediently then flicking her fingers for us to hop on. Miss Kyle however didn't want to leave without hugging Mrs. Clinton first.

While having one arm hurled around Miss Visser, I use my free hand to grab the shrubs of Miss Kyle's neck who had her arms wrapped around Mrs. Clinton. Maybe I should have warned Miss Visser first, because she obviously didn't see it and swooped off with me, Miss Kyle and Mrs. Clinton.

Once we found ourselves in our own time-period and back into the White House, I noticed we are missing a person, and when I asked Miss Kyle what had happened with Mrs. Clinton, she simply shrugged and replied; "I lost my grip on her somewhere between 2016 and this time period. But I think she won't mind."

And with that, the two girls skipped off and I slumped my head into the nearest wall.


	2. Chapter 2

**Hey guys! This chapter was written by The_Riddler95**

#1: We're not allowed to ask questions about the White House  
As the kids enter the White House, the three cops and Alfred walk at the front, gazing at the hallway in awe as they're led by their tour guide. The group passes the grand hall, where they find portraits of all the previous presidents and important artifacts being hung up.  
"Hey, look!" Selina says. "It's a portrait of Abraham Lincoln!"  
Jim looks up at the portrait and sighs, "Selina, that's George Washington."  
"And that's George Washington!" Selina grins, pointing to another portrait.  
Alfred slaps his forehead, "No, that's Abraham Lincoln. What kind of history class did you kids take?"  
TWO MONTHS AGO...  
"Hey, Bruce!" Selina whispers with a grin while at school, peering into Mr. Zeus' office. "This is the perfect chance to get back at him for failing you on that test!"  
Bruce sighs, "It was my fault, I should have studied more."  
Selina smiles at him, "You studied a bunch. Hey, Jonny, do you have any prank stuff?"  
Jonathan walks over and looks in his backpack, pulling out a blue smoke bomb. "This is a gas bomb that will temporarily mess with his vision. Will this work?"  
"That's awesome!" Selina cheers, taking the gas bomb and throwing it into Mr. Zeus' office, and then running away with Bruce and Jonathan.  
An hour later, Bruce, Selina, and the rest of the kids are sitting in their seats quietly and patiently while Mr. Zeus walks in, rubbing his eyes. When he takes his hands off, his eyes are blue. He turns to the class and says, "Okay class, today we'll be learning about US Presidents." He points at a picture of George Washington and says, "This is Abraham Lincoln."  
BACK IN THE PRESENT...  
"Hey, Sean?" Selina asks. "Who do you think would win in a fight between JFK and Abraham Lincoln?"  
"Pfft, Abe, obviously." Sean says. "He fought in the civil war. Okay, who'd win in a fight between George Washington and Theodore Roosevelt?"  
"Hmmm..." Bruce thought. "Well, Teddy has his horse, but George did that thing with the Delaware. What do you think, Alfred?"  
"I think that's a disrespectful question and that the presidents would be frowning upon you right now."  
The kids were quiet for a second, and then Selina asked, "Who'd win in a fight between Abe and Alfred?"  
Sean and Bruce laughed, "Abe would kick Alfred's ass!"

* * *

#2: We're not allowed to make ourselves feel at home  
"Okay, here's your room." The tour guide says, leading the kids into the guest room of the White House. "The adults will stay in another room. Feel free to make yourselves feel at home!"  
The adults follow the tour guide out, and Selina turns to the rest of the kids and grins, "Well, let's make ourselves feel at home. Someone get the streamers and the exercise balls."  
TWO HOURS LATER...  
"NOT THAT MUCH AT HOME!" Alfred yells. "AND GET THOSE VOODOO DOLLS AND THAT PAINTING OF MISTER ORNELAS IN A SPEEDO OFF THE WALL!"  
"I gotta say – you were right, Alf." Selina grins. "Art class wasn't a waste of time."

* * *

#3: We're not allowed to snoop.  
Selina and Annie are sneaking into the oval office in the dark while everyone else is asleep, and Selina is picking the lock on the door. As soon as they're inside, they start looking around in awe.  
"Hey, look!" Selina grins. "It's President Becker's computer!"  
She runs over and powers on the computer, using the mouse to scroll through some files.  
"I'm pretty sure that we'd go to federal jail for doing this." Annie says.  
"We're not messing with anything, we're just looking." Selina shrugs. "Besides, if we have to get away quick, I have you. Now let's see..."  
Annie sighs and walks over to look at the computer. "Wow, is that... a robot army?"  
"Wow, and look!" Selina says. "An invitation email to the Illuminati Christmas party!"  
"Wait... Area 51?" Annie asks. "What's in there?"  
Selina is just about to click on the Area 51 page when suddenly,  
"YOU TWO GIRLS GET AWAY FROM THAT COMPUTER!" Alfred yells, just as Annie grabs Selina's arm and speeds away. Alfred sighs and goes over to turn off the computer when the file on Area 51 catches his eye. He looks around to see if anyone's there, and then slightly moves his hand to click on the file, and suddenly, his eyes light up. "Wait... could that be?"

* * *

#4: We're not allowed to adjust the security system  
"Okay, Annie. You know what to do, right?" Selina asks.  
Annie stands in front of the cat burglar holding an armful of security cameras. "Yeah, but... why are we doing this?"  
"You'll see."  
Annie shrugs and superspeeds away around the White House multiple times until there are security cameras wired into the main system exactly where Selina planned them. When she comes back in front of Selina, she says, "Okay, now what?"  
Selina smiles and turns back to the laptop in front of her. "Now with these security cameras, we can see what's going on all over the White House."  
Annie looks at her confused, "But there are already a bunch of cameras everywhere. Why did we need more?"  
"These ones are put in... special places." Selina grins.  
Annie just watches the cameras as Sean steps into the bathroom and hides behind a shower curtain. Selina then presses a button, and the camera feed switches to a camera inside the shower.  
"You're a genius." Annie smirks.

* * *

#5: We're not allowed to be involved in politics.  
In the White House debate hall, President Becker is sitting before a row of people, and a debate mediator is telling him that he can speak. Alfred, Bruce, Annie, and Selina are sitting in the back watching the debate. Alfred says that the kids need to learn a thing or two about politics if they're staying in the White House.  
"The Republicans oppose our bill only because it will not benefit those in their order." President Becker says, standing up. "We have to think of the entire country here, not just the ones that reform to right-wing ideas."  
"False." says a Republican candidate. "We are not only protecting a civic nationality, but an ethnic group. What you move to do would infringe on-"  
"Or..." Selina says, standing up, against the will of her furious butler. "We could just not do anything and throw a dance party!"  
"What?" asks the republican candidate.  
Annie jumps up and says, "Yeah, and the radio stations could play a non-stop dubstep remix of our national anthem all day! And anyone who doesn't dance must be arrested upon discovery!"  
Bruce jumps up and smiles, "And maybe we could send Valentine's day cards to the leader of North Korea!"  
"Why do I even bother?" Alfred sighs, slumping back in his seat with his hands in his face.

* * *

 **Nine months ago...**

Hillary Clinton stumbled into a dark hall out of nowhere. Dazed, she looked around in shock and confusion, taking a few steps down the hall when she heard some footsteps. She reached for the gun on her belt, but her fingers passed through the air and thought, oh yeah, I banned those.  
"Where am I?" Hillary asked. "What happened to me? Who are you?!"  
"I think the question you should be asking is... what can happen to you?" With a dramatic musical sting, a man stepped out of the shadows of the dark hall. He was wearing a white lab coat and had circular glasses and a chinstrap beard. "My name is Professor Hugo Strange. You are in the cellar of Indian Hill... in 1979."  
"1979?" Hillary gasped. "How?"  
"You see, from analyzing newspapers and keeping an eye on the townspeople, I think I have identified time travellers in our midst. I've been keeping an eye on a young girl named Annie Visser and her friend Selina Kyle."  
"Those are the names of the people I met before! When that girl let go of me when we were running through time, I must have been stranded in a random time period."  
Professor Strange nodded. "Indeed. See, using the tachyon trail that Miss Visser leaves behind whenever she runs through and then splicing the anti-matter particles with Victor Fries' regenerative formula to create an infinite supply, I have created a device which allows me to travel through time. In exactly nine months from now, Annie Visser's friends will travel to the White House to meet President Becker. Years after that, Donald Trump wins an election and becomes President of the United States. I believe that these two events have an inter-temporal connection – one cannot occur without the other happening first. Stop President Becker from being President now, and you prevent Donald Trump from being President in the future."  
Hillary gasped in shock. She couldn't believe what she was hearing, but after she had just lost, she was willing to try anything to become President. "Why do you want to help me?"  
Professor Strange smirked, "Thanks to my time machine, I've seen my own future. I'm caught by Detective Jim Gordon and put in federal jail. As a result, Fish Mooney finds me and forces me to create a monster army that destroys not only Gotham city, but all of America. I need President Becker gone and replaced with a president who can keep me out of federal prison until what needs to be done is done. That's you. What do you say, Mrs. Clinton?"  
"How do we do it?" Hillary grinned, an evil smile spreading across her face.  
Professor Strange opened a door behind him, and Hillary followed him through it. A flight of stairs led up from the ground into broad daylight, where wind blew in her face. Professor Strange stood in front of a bright purple bicycle with two seats.  
"Your time machine is a purple bicycle?" Hillary asked.  
Professor Strange sighed, "It's all I could afford! The Court of Owls can take over the entire city but can't give me a raise after eight f*cking years of working for them, I swear. You getting on or what?"  
Suddenly, Ms. Peabody ran up from the stairs and yelled, "Careful, Professor Strange! Remember, the time period you're going to is dangerously close to when Area 51 is-"  
Before she could finish, Hillary had gotten on the backseat of the bicycle, and Professor Strange calibrated the settings on the keypad at the front. The two of them started pedalling, and a swirling green portal appeared in front of them.  
"We're coming for you, President Becker!" Professor Strange yelled, before he and Hillary disappeared through the portal.


	3. Chapter 3

Selina sneaks down the hallway toward the kitchen of the White House where the cook prepared a nice breakfast then turns his back to trolley with food to grab something from the fridge. Unaware to him, Selina creeps across the floor like a tiger through tall grass then lurking over the edge of the trolley at the cook who has his head still poked into the fridge.

Selina grabs a fist full of bacon then stuffing it into her mouth, instantly. Suddenly a dark shadow casts over her from behind, and Selina smirks with mouth full; "Hiya, Alfred!" Then she grabs the plate with pancakes and disappears through the backdoor before Alfred had the chance to pummel her ears.

While gulping the pancakes down, Selina stands still beside Annie and Bruce who both stare at Bullock who stands in the middle of the golf field, fuming in anger. Sean who stands nearby the lackadaisical cop, backs away disturbed.

"What's up with Harv?" Selina asked.

Still keeping her eyes locked on the crazy cop, Annie replies; "Bullock can't cope the fact Sean is a better golf player than him, so he called in a challenge."

"Yeah, and he's already three points down, so we claimed Sean as the winner, but Bullock refuses to take his loss and is now looking for his ball," Bruce added.

The three teens proceed watching Bullock roars in the distance; "COME ON, HOW HARD CAN IT BE TO FIND A FREAKING BALL?! 40 YEARS OF GOLF AND YOU MAKE A FOOL OF YOURSELF IN FRONT OF A BUCNH OF KIDS!"

Annie, Bruce and Selina watch another minute at Bullock swaying his golf club through the grass like a mad man, and Sean strolls over to Bullock's ball bag to take out a golf ball and drops it into the hole. Then he cups both sides of his mouth and shouts; "BULLOCK, I GUESS I FOUND YOUR BALL!"

Bullock spins around instantly ten rushing over to Sean and spots his ball in the hole and gasps; "A hole-in-one. This is my first hole-in-one in 40 years!"

Annie, Bruce and Selina sprint upon Sean and Bullock and while the lackadaisical cop storms inside the White house, ecstatic, Selina says to Sean; "You're just became 50 degrees hotter by letting Bullock win!"

Then she plants a deep kiss on Sean's lips who starts to blush, madly. Three minutes later, Selina breaks the kiss and grabs Sean's golf club.  
"Now, let me have a go at that ball!"

Selina drops the ball in the grass then swings the club backwards and smashes it against the ball which makes a long trip through the air.  
As the teens stare at the flying ball, a swirling green portal appears in the distance and a bright purple bicycle swoops straight out of it landing into the middle of the golf court. Then Selina's ball smashes the glasses of the man's face who sits on the bicycle front seat.

"AAGH!" The man screamed in horror then saw a big blur of teens running upon him. Then, when he narrowed his eyes, he saw Selina's familiar grin. "Crap, we are too late, Mrs. Clinton!"

Hillary, feeling a little nausea, m***; "What do you mean; we are too late."

"The kids are already here, which means Mr. Becker is president! This is very unfortunate news, our plan has failed. All we can do now is try to calibrate the settings and-

Selina punches Hugo in the face and screams, angrily; "What are you doing here?!"

"Boy, that new formula for my latest knock-out gas makes me see persons that are not here!" Jack laughed while spinning on his feet. Then his vision comes clear again and scowls; "Wait, Professor Strange is really here?! Also, where did you get this cool ride?!"

Jack hops onto Hugo's lap then starts pushing all the buttons on the keypad at once. Suddenly the bicycle starts to rattle and shake, violently.  
"Take cover!" Sean bellowed then hurling Selina over his shoulder before dashing away with her to safety. The others follow quickly while Hugo tries to pull Hillary off the bicycle before they also run to the nearby trees to take cover.

Exactly five seconds later, all the citizens of Washington DC witnessed a big explosion at the White house's golf court.

"You destroyed my time machine!" Hugo roared then trying to catch the maniac boy.

Annie frowns; "Wait, that crazy purple thing was a time machine? How did he even manage to do that?"

Hillary opens her mouth to reply to that question, but then a pack of hungry looking German shepherds run from behind the house cue followed by a group of security guards. Hugo spots them as well and the both of them storm to the gate and start climbing to the other side before disappearing into the distance.

"Is everyone all right?" Jim asked worriedly.

Selina bobs her head and grins; "Yeah, my personal hero named Sean saved me!" Then they kiss for another full five minutes.

Suddenly the butler and the cook both come running outside the White House screaming their heads off and looking as if they are chased. A few seconds later, Johnny comes skipping outside with a gas mask on.

"Mister Crane, what on Earth did you do?!" Alfred roared then sprinting after Johnny who runs back inside. A few seconds later, everyone who are still outside, hear Alfred shriek in fear and screams; "NO! THE OWLS HAVE TAKEN MASTER BRUCE! WE NEED TO SAFE HIM!"

Sean strikes his chin, thoughtfully; "I think it's best we stay outside for a while until Johnny's fear gas subsides."

"Yeah, and the best part is; we learned what Alfred's biggest fear is," Selina said with a smirk.

They all nod agreed, except Hien who says sadly; "Yeah, all that crappy butler cares about is his beloved Bruce Wayne. He still has no love for us!"

Jim, Bullock, Becker and all the security guards slap their foreheads when most of the teens huddle together and start crying, miserably. The only ones who are not crying is Sean and Bruce, mainly because Bruce has no reason to, and Sean simply doesn't care.


End file.
